I remember a few weeks ago when I saw Ryan post a news item about a movie coming out called Madison County and my interest was piqued because there is a Madison County not too far away from my home town. I asked to be put on the review train for this DVD. I thought it would just be good fun to watch a movie named after a place I've known all my life, I was wrong. It was not fun.

Madison County is one of the most banal movies I've seen in quite some time. I'm no stranger to horror movies, I'm quite a big fan of a lot of them, but when something in the genre is content with being immersed in the tropes with no attempt at trying new things or being fun it's just a pain to watch.

It starts, as you can imagine, with kids going on a camping trip, but there's a secret about the place they are going to that not everyone knows about (hint: there's a killer). Kids get freaked out, have odd encounters with strangers and do a lot of standing around and talking. Here's where I got the most perturbed.

Based on the cover of this movie and the tagline “Kiss your axe goodbye” I assumed this movie would know how to have fun, not take itself so seriously, and have enough rolling heads to satisfy my thirst. Again, I was wrong. Madison County tries to be a serious movie. It plays out like a tired teenage melodrama instead of a horror movie. I will give it credit that it's at least trying to coalesce a story out of these characters, but it's not an interesting one.

In the late 18th Century, Barnabas Collins  (Johnny Depp) spurned the love of the witch Angelique (Eva Green) who cursed him, turning him into a vampire and having him buried alive. In 1972, his coffin is found and opened and he returns to his beloved mansion Collinswood where his descendants still live and he discovers the world has changed a lot in the 200 years he was gone, although Angelique is still alive and trying to ruin the Collins’ business and name.

By now, the history of director Tim Burton and his best bud and frequent collaborator Johnny Depp is fairly well known with watershed high points Edward Scissorhands and Ed Wood, followed by lots of “Ed”-less movies that have received mixed reactions. In fact, it almost seems like the weaker the results of their collaboration, the more money a movie will make at the box office, and if that rule holds, Warner Bros should be very happy with the box office performance of  Dark Shadows.

You may already know that this is based on the cult supernatural soap opera of the ‘60s, but rather than maintaining the shoddy charm of the television show’s notoriously poor production values, the film is on the opposite side of the spectrum as Tim Burton and his team do an amazing job introducing the lush environment of Collinsport, Maine, where the story mainly takes place. 

There are a lot of schticks in the horror genre and, more often than not, I either enjoy them or I consider them dumb and harmless.  However, there is one that I am not overly fond of:  "Based on a True Story."

Often, this tagline is solely a marketing gimmick, and the “story” in question turns out to be so preposterous that it ruins the entire experience of the movie when the creators tout it as “real."  Since I feel this way, I'm always leery about watching movies with this tagline, and I certainly felt that way going into The Fields.

Moreover, I was afraid that I was in store for a mediocre movie when the opening credits rolled - which might be some of the dullest credits I've ever seen - and the first 10 minutes went by and I was left unimpressed and anxious that anything would actually happen. Normally, my impatience gets the better of me and I would normally start hating movies like this at this point, but I gave this one a chance and let it play out and in the end I'm glad I did.

The Fields certainly starts out slow and doesn't really speed up until, quite literally, the final 15 minutes.  While I'm still not certain it was worth the payoff, I will say the little story beats and character moments at the end are pulled off really well.

I'm always skeptical about “sequels” to properties. Like, a few years ago when an "official sequel" novel to Bram Stoker's Dracula written by his grand-nephew or something. Needless to say I don't really see a point in doing a sequel to something that wasn't intentionally thought of or doesn't have some sort of connection with the original creators, but it does happen and sometimes they're quite good. Frankesntein Alive, Alive! would certainly be in that category.

If there are two people in the comic book world that know monsters it's Steve Niles and Bernie Wrightson. Being the creators of some of the most influential and memorable monster comics ever there's no need to check their credentials. Plus, with the two of them having worked with the Frankenstein monster before it only makes sense that they would team up to tell this story.

Frankenstein Alive, Alive! is a sequel to Bernie Wrightson's original graphic novel adaptation of Mary Shelley's original tale, making it a sequel to the original story in a sense. Now, the original Frankenstein book is one of my all time favorites so like I said earlier, I was skeptical, but considering I adore Niles and Wrightson's work I was slapped in the face for doubting them.

The TV show and comic book have gone on very different paths, but one thing has remained constant: The Walking Dead characters constantly face tough choices.  Kill a zombie or sneak past it?  Risk your life for supplies or escape to safety and hope for a better opportunity later?  Chop a dude’s hand off or leave him to do it himself?  It provides a lot of “What would I do in that situation” type thinking, so it’s no surprise that the franchise’s first video game is all about choices, with minimal action.  

And who better to deliver that sort of gameplay-lite approach to a big license than Telltale Games, who have tackled Jurassic Park and Back To The Future as well?  I’m sure some folks would prefer a Resident Evil type survival horror adventure game, but this version actually fits the approach of the comic quite nicely – lots of talk, lots of characters, minimal but just enough action to keep you interested…in terms of the original work’s spirit, it’s probably one of the most successful licensed games in recent memory.

It probably seems that I don’t like anything I watch. But, that’s definitely not the case. I just watch a lot of really shitty movies.

Outcast is a mediocre tale of Celtic witchcraft and secret societies. Mary is being sought by an occult group intent upon killing her son, who has a non-ironic mullet. The group sends an assassin armed with ancient mythical powers to seek out and kill the lad. The assassin invokes his magical powers by killing and gutting land fowl. It seems the boy possesses mystical powers which he has yet to fully realize or harness. Thus, the reason for his plotted demise. Against the advisement of his mother, the boy begins a flirtation with danger that could cost him and his mother their lives.  

The film is co-written and directed by Colm McCarthy. I wasn’t particularly impressed with his directorial prowess or his ability as a writer. The whole film has a lackluster quality to it.